So today I am sitting here, watching Gilmore Girls and eating left over Thanksgiving food. Bliss, such bliss. I woke up a little later than usual today, yesterday was a busy day, but it wasn’t from staying up to watch the sunrise while standing in line for Black Friday shopping. This is the first year in probably 5 or 6 years that I didn’t go shopping, I didn’t wait in lines for an hour. This year has been so crazy. Crazy stressful, crazy fun. **THIS IS A DISCLAIMER THAT THIS IS A GUSHY, PERSONAL POST. I WARN, QUIT NOW IF YOU DON’T WANT TO READ IT.**
Many things have changed this year, many stressful things have happened this year. But I wouldn’t change any of those stressful things for the world. Nate and I have been married for about 2.5 years now (I feel like our wedding day was just yesterday, that day was seriously the funnest day ever). These 2.5 years haven’t been easy peasy, they have been stressful but not because of who I am doing life with but because the challenges that have been thrown our way. We have gone through so many life changes and I have handled them okay, but Nate has handled them soooo much better, he hasn’t shown any stress. Sometimes I question his stress level and yell in my head “how in the hell can you not be stressed, show some weakness!”.
Sometimes life isn’t easy, it’s really hard, and sometimes marriage is really hard. And not in the hard like, “I want to throw in the towel and quit” but the hard like, “Gosh, this really freakin sucks but I wouldn’t want to go through any of this without you.” My husband is literally my person (sorry that was sort of mushy gushy oh and queue the Grey’s Anatomy theme song now), I always tell him that he is my one, there is no one that will ever know me the way he does. We have been together for 7 years, we have gone through significant life changes together, even without telling each other every single detail of our day, he still knows everything.
Yesterday made me think (if you are thinking “wow, you had a thought?!”, you’re not very nice!), how in the world would I be able to go after my dreams if it weren’t for him? He doesn’t even blink when we have had a major life change, he listens (or so I think, Nate do you listen?!) to me when I literally freak out when he doesn’t do everything exactly the way I would do it (it’s just who I am okayyyyy). He has probably had a harder year than me but he still puts up with me being stressed. This life would be impossible without him.
I am so, so thankful for the hard times this past year (and for my best friend picking up the phone when I need to talk, you know you have done it too) because without those we wouldn’t have as strong of a marriage as we do.
If you are in a marriage or in a relationship, don’t just quit when you get into rough times, life is hard, life sucks, and it is so so easy to just quit and move on. Relationships aren’t meant to be easy, they are meant to be work. But you are not the only ones who struggle, everyone struggles, no relationship is perfect. Perfect isn’t fun either. We always think everyone else has it so easy but it’s because we never see the bad or the ugly and trust me there is some ugly stuff in relationships. We see everyone’s relationships on those 9 tiny squares or in 10 second intervals. We have complete control over everything that is posted. People don’t get into an argument but say “ohhh that was a good diss, let me get my phone and get that on video. Will you insult me one more time please?”. Hell no, so not how that works. The kissing and making up is what gets recorded or a fake smile is what is put into that tiny square. So please don’t compare yourself to everyone else, life sucks when you compare. Fights happen for a reason, they make good stories at family get-togethers and make you stronger as a couple and as a person!
So thanks, Nate, for putting up with me (I know I can be a handful sometimes) and for being a great dad to our cats (and for kissing them whenever I tell you to). I don’t tell you this kind of stuff enough.